“Let me take a selfie.”
“Do you think he was just doing that to make me jealous?”
“After we go to the bathroom, can we go smoke a cigarette?”
This is true spoken word at the club and is verbatim to the iconic jargon which buzzes in women’s restrooms. Who didn’t do a little ROFL when they first heard the selfie song?
Actions Speak Louder Than words
The age-old adage of this universal truth has its moments of exceptions, that is, when alcohol becomes involved. When speaking aloud in an intoxicated state, words become truer reflections than actions.
The more the slur, the more of the truth.
And it’s marvelous to intercept when getting feedback on your latest fashion risk.
What Happens in the Women’s Restroom at the Club
Ladies wait in line for the bathroom and generally chit chat about one of the following categories: their guy drama, mean girl drama, how drunk they aren’t (as they slur), and how fat they are. On this particular night, I was waiting in line while wearing an “advanced level” crop top. The girl in front of me, who had one too many, scanned me up and down, and she spoke the words to me that would officially validate my crop top ventures.
Crop Top Passes the Drunk Test
“Wow, you look great in that crop top, I wish I could pull that off.”
“Really? Thanks for saying that, I was unsure about my outfit tonight, but I said screw it and wore it anyway.”
Her response while making one of the c’mon faces,
“Noooo girl, you workin’ it.”
Thank you anonymous drunk girl I will never see again, you’re like a fashion omen completing my journey towards wearing an ‘advanced crop top.’ Thank you alcohol for your curious nature in making people tell the truth ruthlessly. Thank you Bssmnt nightclub for existing with a women’s restroom for this prophetical significant moment to occur. I did not dare ruin this magical moment by taking a selfie, #SorryNotSorry.
Advanced Level Crop Top
This was a big moment, and do not dare diminish the significance of this conversation. I am a tanchi with panza and a lot of what goes on regarding getting dressed is frustrating. A lot of that frustration for years turned into self-defeating style prophecies. Even with panza, an advanced level crop is possible, this means expect to show just a tad of skin. Tastefully and stylishly, I wore a well-constructed white leather bebe crop top with seams and adjustable straps (size Medium). I kept it covered below with M.C. Hammer black satin type pants also courtesy of bebe. For women seeking tasteful and stylish crop tops – I have yet to be disappointed by any one tried on at bebe. They have the magic when it comes to this style, even for the curvier types with less than ideal abs.
Make the Crop Pop
With a black and white canvas to play off of, I added in some bold color with a pair 4-inchers in red suede by Steve Madden, a magazine print clutch from Shop Emma Jane, and accessorized with thin gold necklaces layered by Wet Seal. Inspired by J.Lo, the ear bling on thick gold hoops are courtesy of Rue Gembom. It was the kind of night to go all out with bold fashion statements.
Last Thoughts on Wearing Crop Tops
Own it when wearing a crop top. Once it’s done, it’s done, and there is no second guessing or looking back that will do any good. So refrain from eye shifting rapidly from left to right looking as though you’re concerned about who is looking at you and possibly thinking, “How did that girl even get in here?” Keep arms to your side and uncrossed. Trying to cover your belly just looks stupid. No one likes a woman who’s insecure with the potential to kill vibes with her concerns of being fat. Chest up and let it be, aim to be that girl that is talked about in the bathroom with questions like “Did you think that girl was pretty?”, and don’t be the one to ask about that girl.
When in doubt use the XX Pro filter, or Valencia as a backup. Wear cheetah if it looks good, and use “hashtag advanced crop top”, if you choose to take a selfie.
XOXO Chainsmokers & Crop Tops
Bianca for the photos